Parents, Schools Beware: Kids Online Subject to High-Tech Bullying
Released on 06/25/2004, at 12:00 AM
Office of University Communications
University of Nebraska–Lincoln
For today's tech-savvy kids, there's more opportunity to pick on, harass and bully one another: In cyberspace.
For parents who are unfamiliar with online social networks, their student may be the target of "cyber bullying," and they don't even know it.
It's a new concept but it's gaining attention. As more kids spend more time with online and wireless technologies, the issue of cyber bullying becomes better known.
"Bullying is a perpetual issue for students, parents and schools, but the Internet brings bullying to a new high-tech level," said Susan Swearer, assistant professor of educational psychology at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, and an expert on bullying. The Internet is a vehicle for bullying to occur, and many parents are in a different 'technology zone' than their youngster. So they may not even realize there is a potential opportunity for their child to be the victim of harassment from their peers online.
Cyber bullying involves several high-tech forms: e-mail, instant-messaging, chat rooms, "bash boards," small text-messages, "hate" Web sites, "voting booths," and other technology tools that kids are so into these days. Instant-messaging and chat rooms are like e-mail but messages are sent in "real-time" and users can have their access blocked or be ganged-up on. "Hate" Web sites and "voting booth" sites let kids post particularly offensive messages and information (often untrue) about others.
What's particularly maddening about cyber bullying, according to Swearer, is that bullying and intimidation via high-technology, like computers and cellular phones, can be anonymous and horribly public -- transmitted to an entire social network. Being ostracized or harassed via e-mail can be extremely hurtful to a child.
Cyber bullies can exclude or block a classmate from an online chat room, can "hack in" or steal user names and passwords on instant-messaging networks and post hateful messages about another on Web sites and on Web logs. Many cellular phones these days can send text messages to another, as well as digital photographs.
"A lot of parents don't even know what these technologies are. But their kids do," Swearer said. Their entire social network might be tied up in cyberspace, and a cyber-bullying incident may happen at any time or for any number of reasons. Swearer researches bullying and her latest book is "Bullying in American Schools: A Social-Ecological Perspective on Prevention and Intervention." She said bullying, regardless of the form it takes, is about power, humiliation and intimidation.
Parents and schools need to take this issue head on and educate themselves about the technologies and how to help children avoid becoming victims and help them decide what to do if they are bullied.
"Education is the key here," Swearer said. "Parents may be in a different technical zone, but that's not a reason to ignore it. This is more than note-passing and writing mean things on the bathroom wall. It's way more public and pervasive than that."
Schools also need to help lead the discussion on this issue because the school is where children's social network is formed and issues are played out.
"Some schools have the attitude that what kids do on their own time is their own business," Swearer said. "But that's entirely wrong because these issues carry over and are played out at school. Bullying is an important area for parents and schools to work on together."
Swearer recommended basic commonsense oversight of technology as an important strategy for parents.
"Somehow parents have to be able to monitor what their kids are doing online," she said. "The basic advice would be to not let their kids have a computer in their room. If they're not in a private area then there's less likelihood they're going to be doing objectionable things on it -- or it at least opens up communication about it."
Swearer suggested that parents communicate with students about their concerns about instant-messaging and chat rooms and to set up rules for responsible Internet usage. Rules help keep kids safe.
She also suggested discussing common coping strategies for dealing with bullying -- online and off.
"Some basics might be 'don't respond.' 'Don't take the bait,'" she said. "And to talk to Mom and Dad and teachers about things that they need help with. Parents, talk to your kids."
Some kids might be reluctant to admit they're having a problem with cyber bullying because many parents' first reaction would be to take the computer away. That punishes the victim and it threatens the child with loss of an important social and educational lifeline.
She said schools should have a comprehensive bullying policy and plan, and that every school year should start with a discussion about the policy and how to respect one another. If parents don't see a clear bullying policy, they should ask for one.
"Parents need to be a part of changing the culture of schools, and finding a strategy for teaching responsibility and coping-strategies for dealing with bullies," she said.
Here are some tips for prevention and action on cyber bullying for kids and parents from the Media Awareness Network:
* Guard your contact information. Don't give people you don't know your cell phone number, instant messaging name or e-mail address.
* Never give out your passwords. Make passwords difficult to guess and have a different one for each site or use.
* If you are being harassed online, immediately tell an adult you trust -- a teacher, parent, older sibling or grandparent.
* If you are being harassed, leave the area or stop the activity (e.g., chat room, news group, online gaming area, instant messaging, etc.).
* If you are being bullied through e-mail or instant messaging, block the sender's messages. Never reply to harassing messages.
* Save any harassing messages and forward them to your Internet service provider (e.g., Hotmail or Yahoo). Most service providers have appropriate use policies that restrict users from harassing others over the Internet -- and that includes kids!
* If the bullying includes physical threats, tell the police as well.
* Take a stand against cyber bullying with your peers. Speak out whenever you see someone being mean to another person online. Most kids respond better to criticism from their peers than to disapproval from adults.
* Parents, sit with your child when they are signing up for an IM (instant-messaging) account. If not careful, they can give others a great deal of access to personal contact information. Users of IM should create a buddy list of only people they know and trust well. Most IM programs allow users to create a list of others that users may wish to "block" from sending them messages or contacting them for the purposes of chatting in real time.
* Kids need to be cautioned again and again that people are not always who they appear to be or who they say they are in chat rooms. Chat rooms can be places where some strangers may try to "befriend" others, especially young people. They may attempt to lure them into meeting in person. Young people should NEVER arrange to meet someone in person whom they have been in contact with online.
* Young kids shouldn't be in chat room unless a trusted and responsible parent or guardian is sitting with them at the computer.
For more information, consult these Web sites:
* www.bullyonline.org/related/cyber.htm
CONTACT: Susan Swearer, Asst. Professor, Educational Psychology, (402) 472-1741